Dear Dani: Your go-to guide for cul­ti­vat­ing joy, pos­i­tiv­i­ty, and hap­pi­ness in every­day life. If you’re ready to lead a more joy­ful and pos­i­tive life, then this col­umn of­fers prac­ti­cal, ac­tion­able ad­vice root­ed in mind­set mas­tery, thought re­train­ing, and self-care prac­tices. Join Dear Dani and to­geth­er we’ll ex­plore how small but in­ten­tion­al changes can trans­form your well-be­ing and help you thrive.

Email your ques­tions on how to lev­el up your life to dani.sta­cy@gmail.com

Giv­ing up quick­ly

Dear Dani,

Every time I start some­thing new—whether it’s my New Year res­o­lu­tions like ex­er­cis­ing, bud­get­ing, or even a new hob­by—I al­ways give up. So my 2025 res­o­lu­tions nev­er made it through the 1,000 days of Jan­u­ary, and now I’m so frus­trat­ed with my­self for not stick­ing to any­thing.

Why is it so hard for me to stay con­sis­tent, and how can I break this cy­cle?

Dear Read­er,

Ah yes, the “start strong but fin­ish-nev­er strug­gle”—it’s re­al!

You’re not alone, trust me. The trick is start­ing with tiny goals. In­stead of run­ning a 5K every day, start with a ten-minute walk. In­stead of over­haul­ing your bud­get, fo­cus on sav­ing $50 a day by cut­ting back on the num­ber of days you buy lunch in the food yards.

Think of con­sis­ten­cy and self-dis­ci­pline as mus­cles, so start light and build; the more you do it, the eas­i­er it be­comes as it’s now part of your nor­mal rou­tine. And re­mem­ber, back­slid­ing is part of the process. If you lapse for a few days or even weeks, don’t beat up; just dust your­self off and try again ... or what­ev­er Aaliyah said. Progress over per­fec­tion, my friend.

Dani

Go­ing through the mo­tions

Dear Dani,

My life feels like a con­stant hus­tle: work, traf­fic, bills, re­peat. There’s no time for “me,” and I feel like I’m los­ing touch with who I am. How do I break free from this cy­cle of just ex­ist­ing and start liv­ing?

Dear Read­er, Life in Trin­ba­go can feel like a per­ma­nent ham­ster wheel—es­pe­cial­ly if you’re bat­tling that dai­ly high­way traf­fic. That alone is enough to suck the joy out of your day!

But here’s the thing—you can’t al­ways con­trol what’s hap­pen­ing around you, but you can con­trol what’s hap­pen­ing with­in you. In­stead of let­ting things dic­tate your mood, start fo­cus­ing on small, in­ten­tion­al ways to re­con­nect with your­self. Carve out just ten min­utes a day to do some­thing that brings you joy or makes your heart jump and wave a lit­tle—sip your cof­fee or tea with­out dis­trac­tions (no emails, no scrolling). Just you and your cup. Do a quick five-minute stretch be­fore div­ing in­to your day. Bonus points if you throw in a deep breath or two.

Some­times I do the silent-dri­ve chal­lenge—no ra­dio, no calls, no noise; just let­ting my mind breathe. Al­so a good rule of thumb: no doom­scrolling first thing in the morn­ing or 30 min­utes be­fore bed. So­cial me­dia drains you just as much as the traf­fic can. You’re prob­a­bly think­ing, so what’s the point of this, Dani? Well, these lit­tle mo­ments re­mind you that life isn’t just about the grind. The se­cret? Pick one and com­mit to it. Even five min­utes of in­ten­tion­al “me time” can shift your en­er­gy.

Small mo­ments add up! Be con­sis­tent, and soon you’ll find those five to ten min­utes stretch­ing in­to longer mo­ments. You get to de­cide how you ex­pe­ri­ence your day—so choose mo­ments that make you feel alive. You got this!

Dani