Domestic Violence Awareness Month, observed every October, is a period dedicated to raising awareness about the prevalence and impact of domestic violence. This month-long campaign aims to educate the public about the signs of abuse and the resources available to victims.
In T&T, during the ten-year margin between 2005 and 2015, the Trinidad Coalition Against Domestic Violence reported that 300 women were murdered and there were up to 7,000 cases of domestic violence reported to the authorities.
During the period of January-March 2020, the scourge of domestic violence showed no signs of abating, as the Ministry of Social Development and Family Services reported 556 cases of domestic violence in 2020 and 826 for the same period in 2021.
Only a few days into 2024, two women were shot dead at their home by an estranged male partner of one of the women following a bitter separation. The violence against women continued throughout this year.
Characterised often by silence, domestic violence requires an integrated approach to support victims in coming forward. During Domestic Violence Awareness Month, advocacy efforts also focus on promoting policy changes and improving services for victims. This includes pushing for stronger legal protections, better funding for shelters and support programmes, and increased training for law enforcement and healthcare providers.
Public awareness campaigns often highlight the importance of bystander intervention and encourage individuals to seek refuge wherever possible when the signs of abuse arise.
Makeda Charles, born in T&T and raised in Siparia throughout her early childhood, moved from T&T to the United States to be with her mother at ten years old following the passing of her father. Upon arriving in the US, Charles was met with a stepfather in the home who was “physically violent to everyone in the family.”
Detailing the instances of abuse, she describes the way he overturned the bunk bed that she and her brother slept on, would be physically violent and verbally abusive to her mother, even while she was pregnant, and that he sexually assaulted Charles at 12 years old. Shrouded in silence for many years, Charles felt unable to come forward to her family members about the assault and continued to suffer her stepfather’s abuse.
At 15, she would join a programme that would change her life. Summer Search, an NGO in NYC with branches throughout the United States, is a programme offering high school students empowerment and guidance, allowing them to thrive through mentoring and summers of experiential learning. It was during her interview for induction into Summer Search that Charles finally found the words to speak up about her abuse.
“In front of a group of seven staff, I somehow felt safe to tell them about what happened to me,” she recalls. Eventually, after some time in the programme, “we decided together to have a meeting with my family to tell them what was going on. But my stepfather never came.”
At that point of telling the rest of her family about the abuse, she decided to stand up to her stepfather and tell him that the abuse had to stop. And with increased scrutiny of the situation, it did. “I wanted a redemptive solution,” Charles said as she remembered the depression that overcame her in the years to follow.
As a churchgoing family, she hoped and prayed that one day he would confess and repent, but as she still lived at home, she feared pushing the issue any further, concerned that his wrath would cause greater harm to herself or her brother.
Upon completing her final year in high school, she felt “burnt out, just wanted to sleep all the time, and forever battling an overwhelming sadness.” For Charles, this meant that she felt unable to start university immediately after high school and instead sought help to “heal from the inside.”
She recalled relying strongly on her faith, listening to sermons and lectures, reading inspirational books, seeking support from a social worker through free clinical services at a hospital, and speaking to her colleagues and mentors from Summer Search. During this time, she also went on a wilderness expedition in Minnesota and counts those grounding moments as an integral part of her healing journey.
Charles is an advocate for domestic violence and hopes to see fewer instances of domestic violence in T&T and greater recourse for victims. From a socio-political angle, she said that police need to provide greater protection, including enhanced personal/home security for people who make reports, to avoid retaliation by the perpetrator.
“It’s not enough to give a court order, but resources should be used to guard victims. Victims should also be given the opportunity to learn self-defence skills, while perpetrators should be counselled on anger management.”
She encourages a shift in the education system that often teaches young women to be silent and submissive towards new values where women are not seen as passive objects to be controlled.
On a personal level, she speaks to victims’ relatives, encouraging them to believe victims who come forward and house and shelter them. For victims themselves, she said they need to document everything. “Take pictures of marks on the skin, record calls, and be ready to show proof how this person has been abusing you or even threatening you.”
Now 35 years old, she has never forgotten her childhood and young adulthood, marred by abuse and assault, but she credits the help of God and a significant amount of dedicated self-work for her healing. She has amassed an impressive education, including her Bachelor’s degree in Psychology, and a Master’s in Social Work.
“I’ve always been curious about human behaviour,” she says, “and I want to also help people recover from traumatic experiences like I was able to recover.” Brave and strong, she has found her voice, found healing, and been able to use her story to touch survivors of abuse and “to become a person of love.”
Her key message to victims is that “when you find the strength to report it and you get out—never go back.”
